Friends, I say this with all compassion: Some relationship issues simply will not be resolved.

“I do not understand how we got here.” My confused voice was calm as I spoke to the leader over the phone. “I’m not sure how it has come to this, but I want to understand. Can you help me?”

“Mel,” the leader replied, anger evident in his voice, “If you do not understand, I cannot help you.”

“I’m sorry. I feel like there must have been some miscommunication along the way because this isn’t adding up. Can we back up and look at it again? Hello?” I suddenly realized I was speaking into dead air. A leader I had worked closely with for two years and who I deeply respected had just hung up on me.

I slumped onto my couch as tears ran down my face.

The Reality of Ministry Leadership

Leading in ministry is often filled with deep joy. In the best of times, it draws us closer to Jesus as we partner with Him, filling our hearts with a profound sense of fulfillment. But because we work with people, it can also be fraught with relational strife and confusion. At times, a fellow staff member, parent, or volunteer may become distant or even angry with us.

We may not understand why, or worse, we may fully understand but find them unwilling to move forward.

When we’re hurt, it is easy to get caught up in the pain—replaying conversations, analyzing words, and feeling the sting of rejection repeatedly. But I think we can all agree that rarely accomplishes anything. As followers of Jesus, we are not called to carry the weight of unresolved relationships alone.

Friends, I say this with all compassion: Some relationship issues simply will not be resolved. I know that doesn’t feel good, and I know the frustration that comes with it. There are times we must move on and work toward healing even when the issue hasn’t been resolved.

Healing When Reconciliation Isn’t Possible

Healing doesn’t always mean restored relationships, but it does mean restored hearts. God can do deep healing within us even when reconciliation isn’t possible. When reconciliation isn’t in our hands, we are not helpless. We serve a big God who invites us to come to Him.

1. Give Your Pain and Frustration to God

“Give your burdens to the Lord, and He will take care of you. He will not permit the godly to slip and fall.” —Psalm 55:22 (NLT)

God invites us to bring our pain and confusion to Him. We are loved by a God who always welcomes us and delights in hearing from us. Go to Him with your sadness, anger, and frustration, and let Him carry it. Personally, I often journal everything out and then give it over to God. Take it to Him, friends.

2. Choose to Forgive

“Be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.” —Ephesians 4:32 (NLT)

You may never be asked for forgiveness by the person who hurt you, but you can still forgive. Forgiveness does not mean what happened was okay or didn’t hurt. Forgiveness does release you from resentment. I have found forgiveness to be an ongoing, intentional act. As the pain resurfaces, I give it back over to God and choose to forgive again. And sometimes, I do it all again the very next day.

3. Remind Yourself That God Knows

“The Lord is watching everywhere, keeping His eye on both the evil and the good.” —Proverbs 15:3 (NLT)

God sees the hurt you have endured. He is not blind to injustice. He sees and knows. It is His job to bring justice, not yours. You are not alone.

Self-Reflection for Growth

I firmly believe I am not perfect and do not always handle things well. With that in mind, I try to be quick to self-reflect when relationships or situations turn sour. I seek guidance from trusted mentors and ask myself these key questions:

1. What part of this should I own?
   I have yet to experience a situation where I was completely blameless. Even in situations where I had done very little wrong, I have always found something to own.
   
2. What can I learn from this?
   Ideally, I am growing as a leader and follower of Jesus. When situations are particularly difficult, I often come to a deeper understanding of how the Holy Spirit works. I always have something to learn.
   
3. What should I do?
   Should I apologize? Set up a meeting? Write a letter? Be silent? I want to ensure I am leaving space for reconciliation because it does indeed take two. What, if anything, do I need to do?
   
4. Am I holding onto things I need to let go of?
   This is perhaps the hardest question. For me, the answer is almost always yes. I want to believe people are good, kind, and fair, but just because I wish it does not make it so. That does not mean I should carry wrongs or sins that are not mine to own.

Trusting God with the Outcome

This topic is far deeper than a simple blog post. Hurtful situations where reconciliation is not possible are incredibly painful. I have spent significant time in therapy processing many of these experiences. In fact, the man I mentioned at the beginning of this article was a dear friend. I wanted him to remain a dear and trusted friend, but unfortunately, he chose to believe a lie about me. Instead of talking to me, he made his own decisions and refused to have a conversation. To this day, our relationship remains broken.

I have ached over it, cried about it, and wrestled with confusion, but I have finally released it. None of it has been easy, but I love Jesus even more because of walking through it with Him. God never wastes our pain, and He is always at work. I cling to the truth of who Jesus is and keep moving forward. I would rather be in the center of God’s will, doing ministry, than be bitter and angry.

“Then Jesus said, ‘Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest.'” —Matthew 11:28 (NLT)

Find deep soul rest in Him today.

More Encouragement from Melissa J. MacDonald

• How to Create Space for Kids to Lead
• Ministry Leader, God Was Made for This—Trust Him
• Serving People When They’re Hard to Love
• 5 Things to Remember When Ministry Gets Hard
• When Kids Walk Away from Their Faith
• Created for Wonder: How to Recapture Wonder in Your Life
• Spiritual Formation in the Church, Home, and Community
• How to Welcome Families and Engage Kids in Big Church
• Take a New Grip: Encouragement for Children’s Ministers
• The Importance of Faith Formation in Your Volunteers

Caring for Your Soul as a Ministry Leader

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Caring for Your Soul as a Ministry Leader

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Caring for Your Soul as a Ministry Leader

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I’ve never had anyone disagree with me or shout from the crowd “actually you’re wrong!” The thing about statements like that is they can be powerful, but they are simply words unless we live and operate like we mean it.

How do we practically allow children to serve and grow and even lead alongside of us?

First, we have to change our perception. Kids are not the church of tomorrow; they are the church of today. They are contributing members of the body of Christ today. Nowhere in Scripture are they told to hide their lights under a bushel until they are a certain age.

Kids have been highlighted, welcomed, and used by God since the beginning of time.

• God used Naaman’s servant girl to change the heart of a warrior and to heal his body.

• Samuel was chosen to hear His voice and obey Him.

• God used Moses as a baby to set the stage for a much larger story.

• A boy with no name but a bag full of fish and bread was used feed an entire city of people while having a front row seat to a miracle.

God’s perception and heart for kids is that they can be used, and we can learn from them. Here are some practical ways you can encourage kids to lead and grow in your context.

Helping Kids Lead

1. Make space.

Literally make space. In your building, in your church sanctuary, in your service structure.

So often kids are given the leftover parts of the building. And while it’s true that their knees are younger than many, that doesn’t mean they should always be in the basement. Give them top billing.

Create space or at least make the space they have bright and inviting and conducive to learning. In your service space consider creating family seating. A place that is warm and inviting and lets families know they are welcome and seen.

I believe every facet of the church service should have kids in mind. Think about them and adjust for them. Explain big words, mention them from the stage, and encourage them to jump around. If you have a separate kids’ church time, invite them to go to their worship service instead of dismissing them from the adult service.

2. Allow them to serve.

I occasionally guest preach at a tiny country church near my hometown, and I love it. I take my little family, and we all get involved. My 10-year-old son helps take offering and the other little boy in the church reverently lights the candles.

They each have a role, and they take it seriously.

The beauty of it is they are not on display as “this is our kids’ Sunday” they are accepted as participants who help serve. Put kids on your greeting schedule, let them help with offering, have them do the welcome prayer. Allow kids to serve not as a token, but because they are capable and contributing members of the body of Christ.

3. Listen to them.

Several years ago, I was doing a church consultation. My job was to simply observe and then share my observations on their children’s and family ministries and their overall appeal to kids and families.

I sat quietly in the service while we sang nice songs, heard nice announcements, and then the kids were dismissed. Once the kids were gone, the pastor made a statement that very much implied that, “Now the kids have left, the Holy Spirit can move.”

I left my chair and instead of going up front to bring a Word from the Lord to the pastor I headed to the kids’ area. In their time together they were sharing about how God had moved in their week, where they had seen Him show up, what they were learning, and how much they loved God.

We need to be listening to kids. They are hearing from God, and they are seeing things we need to hear. We can’t just say we need to listen—we actually need to do it.

Create space for that to happen. Let them draw pictures or write it down so others can see, let them speak out loud. If they’ve shared throughout the week get permission from them to share with others. We need to hear from them, and they need to know we care about what they are saying.

4. Involve them.

Twenty years ago, I put a 13-year-old boy on the mission’s committee I was leading. He was my youngest member, and my oldest was 80. I shocked everyone, and I was young enough that I was surprised they were shocked.

We kept saying we wanted to appeal to all ages and get all ages passionate about missions. I figured if we wanted that to happen, we needed varying ages on our committee. The young boy had so much to offer, and we learned to listen to him and figure out how to take what he was sharing and contextualize it for our missions’ program.

It was a huge turning point for us. Later that year I led a mission’s trip that was multi-generational and family oriented. Those families were forever changed. All because we involved a kid.

Even now I involve kids. Instead of telling them my plan for the children’s ministry or special event for kids and families, I ask them for their ideas.

I genuinely want to know what they think, and I involve them in the process. This has resulted in kids learning early that they matter, and their involvement makes a difference.

The Action Bible Anytime Devotions

For ministry leaders, parents, and kids alike! With practical life lessons and simple prayers, The Action Bible Anytime Devotions engages kids in active faith as they learn how to connect with God anytime, anywhere.

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The Action Bible Anytime Devotions

For ministry leaders, parents, and kids alike! With practical life lessons and simple prayers, The Action Bible Anytime Devotions engages kids in active faith as they learn how to connect with God anytime, anywhere.

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5. Call them out.

Once I’ve done all those things, I love to call out greatness in kids. It’s one of my favorite things. I prayerfully watch them, listen to them, rub shoulders with them, and call out what I see in them.

• “My goodness, you are always so quick to help. God has given you such a servant’s heart! Thank you for serving.”

• “You prayed today in a way that was exactly what I needed to hear. I could tell you were really listening to God.”

• “I saw how you looked out for your friend who was sad. Thank you. You have such a kind and compassionate heart!”

Over the summer this year, I was speaking to a large group of kids. I was asking a question about a Bible story and a 5-year-old girl had the answer to everything. She was spot on every time. I finally brought her on stage and asked her to tell us what we needed to know. She beautifully put the story into context and didn’t miss a beat.

Later I told her in front of her dad I could tell God had given her courage and the ability to help stories make sense. She grinned at me and ran off to color. Her dad had tears in his eyes and thanked me.

Leaders, how we lead matters and who we allow to lead alongside us matters. Stretch yourself and ask how you can truly bring kids along with you. Make it a matter of prayer.

Through the years I have humbly realized they don’t need to hear from us nearly as much as we need to hear from them.

I celebrated 20 years in full-time children’s ministry in September. And it’s looked different in seasons—but always working either for kids or with kids. And I have a great heart and love kids, but one of the things that I had to learn early on is that my great heart doesn’t make me great. And my heart for kids is not the driving force of who I am.

The driving force of who I am is who Jesus says I am. And I will tell you right now you’re not made for this. None of us are actually made for this. We serve a really big God who gives us what we need and equips us to do His work.

You Were Made for This

Ministry feels hard because it is hard. Feeling hard doesn’t mean it’s bad. Hard doesn’t mean bad. There are times that hard causes you to lean in and listen closely. What does God say? What do I need to discern?

And if you look throughout Scripture, friends, the bad news is that it’s just hard. In this world you will have trouble. We like to say that, but actually that verse continues.

But take heart! I have overcome the world. (John 16:33 NIV)

And so, my heart for all of you in ministry is to lean in and hear from God. What does He say? Who does He say I am?

You see, I’ve been through a lot in life and in ministry. And I’m really good at saying what I should say. But early on I was not good at living it out myself. I was young and not fully self-aware. And I just remember watching those words float through the air. And I remember thinking, I think I need to press into that. I think I need to figure that out.

And one of the things I learned was that I am not the sum of what I can accomplish. I am not the sum of how much I can do. God gifted me and called me, but that doesn’t make me who I am.

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You Are More than What You Do

I am who He says I am. And before we figure out anything else, we have to figure out who God says we are.

One thing I would encourage you is to write down the lies you’ve believed and then combat them with the truth of Scripture. Remind yourself of God’s character—who He is. It leads to a beautiful unraveling.

You’re made for this because God calls you His child. You’re made for this because He says you’re worthwhile. He sees you. He created you and formed you. And that’s what matters.

It’s easy to tie up everything into what we can accomplish in our work world. And let’s be really careful that we don’t try to make ministry be who we are.

If God’s voice is not the loudest in your ear, you’re doing it wrong. You’ve got to be listening to Him first.

You Matter

You matter because God made you. If you took away everything you could ever do, you would still matter to God.

You were made by God on purpose for a reason. You are loved by Him. Period.

So often as adults we try to figure out “more.” What’s the something else? What’s the secret sauce? The secret sauce is we’ve already got it.

You have searched me, Lord,
    and you know me.
² You know when I sit and when I rise;
    you perceive my thoughts from afar.
³ You discern my going out and my lying down;
    you are familiar with all my ways.
⁴ Before a word is on my tongue
    you, Lord, know it completely.
⁵ You hem me in behind and before,
    and you lay your hand upon me.
⁶ Such knowledge is too wonderful for me,
    too lofty for me to attain.

⁷ Where can I go from your Spirit?
    Where can I flee from your presence?
⁸ If I go up to the heavens, you are there;
    if I make my bed in the depths, you are there.
⁹ If I rise on the wings of the dawn,
    if I settle on the far side of the sea,
¹⁰ even there your hand will guide me,
    your right hand will hold me fast.
¹¹ If I say, “Surely the darkness will hide me
    and the light become night around me,”
¹² even the darkness will not be dark to you;
    the night will shine like the day,
    for darkness is as light to you.

¹³ For you created my inmost being;
    you knit me together in my mother’s womb.
¹⁴ I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made;
    your works are wonderful,
    I know that full well.
¹⁵ My frame was not hidden from you
    when I was made in the secret place,
    when I was woven together in the depths of the earth.

Psalm 139: 1-15 NIV

Listen and Serve

First and foremost, you are called to tune your ear to God’s voice. And you are called to serve Him wherever He has placed you.

After 20 years in ministry, I have deep spiritual wounds. The point is this, I learned early on that the people who lied were people and not God. And the people who spread the rumors, they were people, they weren’t God.

When I began to realize that I’m called to serve God first period. Always. The specific churches and roles and people do not define who I am, but rather who I serve. This approach will change how you go into meetings. It changes the unhealthy ownership that you have going on and shifts it to servitude. You are serving God’s ministry. We just get to be a part of what God’s doing.

When I think about what I am made to do, I’m made to serve God.

And, friends, some of you need to know that you are not junk. God doesn’t make junk.

And because God doesn’t make junk, He is a good God. And you have a good calling and a good purpose. Sit with Jesus, and then sit with Him some more. He’ll remind you of what’s true. And He’ll make you into a healthy leader.

Drown the Noise

There’s a lot of noise in ministry—voices from within, from volunteers, parents, team members, leadership, you name it. The only way to combat the noise and do what God wants is to listen to Him.

Because if you are not healthy spiritually, if you are not tuning your ear to Jesus regularly, it will show up in every spot of your life. Can you fake it? Sure. But it will wear you down.

“Before I formed you in the womb I knew you,
    before you were born I set you apart;
    I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.”

Jeremiah 1:5 NIV

I believe this verse is true about every person. He made you. The more you tune your ear to God’s voice, the more He equips you for what He has called you to do.

He always gives me what I need. I have found time and time again that overflow comes out of me when I am sitting with my abundant God. It’s amazing because it is so much deeper and richer than the lack of.

He Is Good, Trust Him

The Lord is my shepherd, I lack nothing.
²     He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,
³     he refreshes my soul.
He guides me along the right paths
    for his name’s sake.
⁴ Even though I walk
    through the darkest valley,^[a]
I will fear no evil,
    for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
    they comfort me.

⁵ You prepare a table before me
    in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
    my cup overflows.
⁶ Surely your goodness and love will follow me
    all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the Lord
    forever.

Psalm 23 NIV

Friends, we serve a God who pursues us—whether we want it or not. We serve a God who’s present—whether we recognize it or not. Our job is not to prove that—our job is to pause and listen.

God, we already know You’re here. Help us to notice You.

Penny got to attend a full church service for the first time in years. She couldn’t believe it. Later we discovered that Penny had been asked to leave multiple churches due to her boys. They were “too rambunctious” and “disruptive.”

In this new church, they were never once asked to leave. In fact, they were embraced. This church was focused on serving people. And they saw that Penny and her boys have value.

People Have Worth—Serve People Well

Bea started showing up at the church up the street from where she lived in nearby, low-income housing. At age 6 she was the youngest of her siblings, all of whom were being raised by a single mom. Bea showed up because she discovered the church had snacks, and she was always welcome in the doors.

There were times where she walked up the street to the church because she didn’t like who her mom had in the house. She felt safe at the church. The church enveloped her and her family. Bea was extremely loveable, but her mom was harder to love.

Bea’s mom was inconsistent, addicted, flighty, and unaware of what was going on with her kids right under her nose. The people of the church stepped in where they were allowed. They fed Bea and her siblings, they helped find clothes for all of them, and they made sure the mom knew they were for her.

It was messy, it was complicated, and it was hard. And yet, the people of the church showed up for Bea and her family time and time again. This church was focused on serving people. And they saw that Bea and her family have value.

Looking for the Need

When the pandemic hit, I stopped flying places and started walking my neighborhood. Up the street and around the corner from our house is another house. It’s full of kids and dogs and who knows what else. I walked by it regularly and could see kids in the windows staring out.

When I waved, they hid. I started praying for that house and for those kids. I asked God to protect them, and I asked Him to give me a way to get to know them. A few weeks after I started praying, one of the kids came to my front door.

He rang my doorbell and asked if I had any work he could do.

We found work for him to do. Honestly, he wasn’t a good worker. This child was easily distracted. He seemed more interested with the tools in our garage then he was with working. And he quickly started showing up regularly. He was too skinny, he told us he was failing in school, his fingers had clearly been broken at some point and never properly set, and he had a speech impediment that was hard to understand.

My husband and I found jobs for him mostly so I could feed him. He would sit on our front porch and devour whatever I brought him. Eventually he brought his little sister to meet us. After that he brought his pride and joy—his dog Demon—over to meet us.

Eventually he stole something from us, and we had to talk to him about boundaries. He stopped coming by, but he often rides by on his bike, and we wave at him. I give him popsicles when it’s hot out.

Serving people is important. He has value.

Making an Impact in Your Children’s Ministry

Why Your Curriculum Matters and How to Choose the Right One
This guide was created to help you dive into some of the topics facing your ministries today and lead into why your curriculum matters and how to choose the right one depending on your needs.

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How to Guard Yourself from Ministry Burnout

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How to Guard Yourself from Ministry Burnout

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Learning from Jesus

Lately I’ve been spending a lot of time in the Gospels learning as much as I can about the heart of Jesus and His ministry here on earth. I’ve been deeply impacted by a few themes.

One of the common themes I’ve noticed is Jesus never once told someone who approached Him that they needed to “clean up” or “quiet down” or “get it together” before He could help them. They didn’t have to dust themselves off and pull themselves together for Him to hear them or for them to approach Him. He welcomed them as they were.

They had value.

Another theme I’ve noticed is that Jesus purposely reached out to those whom others overlooked or found unlovable—people like the woman who was bleeding, the lame man, the lepers, etc. I don’t believe Jesus did that because He had some sort of “discipleship strategy” for growing the church—I think He valued everyone at every level regardless of how they looked, smelled, acted, or were living.

He genuinely loved and valued all.

The last theme I’ve been impacted by is that Jesus did not ignore people’s basic needs while meeting their spiritual needs. He fed the 5,000, He healed the blind man, and He healed Peter’s mother-in-law. He understood the holistic nature of people.

Jesus understood that people who had food in their bellies could hear Him better. He understood that lame men who could walk would carry His message further. He got it.

More Like Jesus

I want to be more like Jesus. Don’t we all? Sometimes that is easy to say and a lot harder to actually live out.

The reality is, we live in a hard world. It’s hard to be human in this world, let alone follow Jesus. People are hard to love—I’m hard to love.

If I’m honest, there are individuals and whole families I would rather not engage with. They are hard, they are messy, they are complicated and those are the easy ones! Then there are families who are antagonistic, ungrateful, unkind, and just plain mean. There is no one on this earth who is not, at some time or another, hard to love. And that makes serving people hard.

And yet, nobody on this earth is without value. Some people need less of me creating a “membership path” for them in my local church and more of me loving them where they are at with what they need.

That may mean I drop off clothes, give rides, join them at their doctor’s appointments, or buy them a jug of milk. They may need my presence more than my process. They may need me to love them the way Jesus loves them.

Serving People in Every Season

The lesson I am continuing to learn is that I am called to love and serve regardless of whether it feels easy or hard. Jesus was not concerned with the hard or the easy—He was concerned with the value of the person.

While it may seem cliché … when I reach my “limit,” I consistently ask myself “What would Jesus do?” and “How would Jesus love?”

When I approach people with that thought, my limit doesn’t matter because it is expanded and even dissolved by my Creator.

Everyone has worth. Everyone has value. And everyone is worthy of unexplained, unexpected, undeserved grace and love. Because that is exactly what we have been given.

More from Melissa

• Webinar: Encouragement for Children’s Ministry Leaders: You Were Made for This
• 5 Things to Remember When Ministry Gets Hard
• When Kids Walk Away from Their Faith
• Created for Wonder: How to Recapture Wonder in Your Life
• Spiritual Formation in the Church, Home, and Community
• How to Welcome Families and Engage Kids in Big Church
• Webinar: Engaging Kids in Big Church
• Take a New Grip: Encouragement for Children’s Ministers
• The Importance of Faith Formation in Your Volunteers

A collective loud gasp of shock punctuated by cries of “that’s not true!” and “WHAT?!” greeted my question to a summer camp full of 3^rd-5^th grade kids.

One boy looked me straight in the eye, “our lives are hard, really hard because this world is hard.”.

That boy perfectly summed up the point I was trying to make. Regardless of your age, doing life in this world is hard. Doing life as a follower of Jesus is even harder! Doing life as a follower of Jesus serving others might just be the hardest of all.

I often remind leaders that it feels hard because it is hard. In ministry—especially in ministry to children and families—I believe we are on the front lines of the battle. The enemy would much rather silence and discourage us than see us persevere.

Over 10 years ago when I was speaking at a summer camp, I had a line of kids next to me in the chapel who were sharing their life stories with me one at a time—I was hearing the good, the bad, and the ugly. Emphasis on the ugly.

So much hurt and so much pain.

As the last one poured her heart out to me, I felt my soul crumble. I couldn’t do it anymore. I prayed with her like a good camp pastor, but then I went and sat in my car and cried my eyes out telling God I was done.

How to Guard Yourself from Ministry Burnout

There are moments in every leader’s journey that defines whether they move forward or give up. Things happen, life gets hard, and opportunities come and go. Download this guide to be encouraged in your leadership walk with the Lord!

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How to Guard Yourself from Ministry Burnout

There are moments in every leader’s journey that defines whether they move forward or give up. Things happen, life gets hard, and opportunities come and go. Download this guide to be encouraged in your leadership walk with the Lord!

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How to Guard Yourself from Ministry Burnout

There are moments in every leader’s journey that defines whether they move forward or give up. Things happen, life gets hard, and opportunities come and go. Download this guide to be encouraged in your leadership walk with the Lord!

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Ministry Is Hard

I was done doing ministry, I was done listening, I was quitting. And I even remember asking God to take my calling because I didn’t want it anymore.

I could blame that crisis moment on camp exhaustion, my less than amazing camp lodging, or even the camp food that seemed to only require the “cooks” to use a can opener to make meals. However, the reality is it was a crisis, a turning point.

I was carrying everything and everyone and very suddenly realized I couldn’t do it anymore. The joy and the pain of ministry were all colliding, and I was bent over under the weight of it all. God in His kindness began to reveal to me some very important lessons about doing ministry in the hard and the messy.

1. It’s okay to admit it’s hard.

Because it is. It’s okay not to put a neat bow on everything and simply admit it’s hard it hurts. Among many Christ followers, there is an epidemic of trying to force everything to be good or look good when everything is not good.

We can sit in the pain without fixing it. Because we aren’t meant to fix it anyways.

2. I am not the Holy Spirit.

I am not the great fixer or savior. No matter how much I want to, I cannot make kids respond or make them change or even change their circumstances. I can be obedient. I can pray for them. And I can point to the Holy Spirit, but I cannot take on His job.

I do my job best when I point to Him and when I continually surrender myself and the burdens I feel to Him.

3. I must spend time with Him.

In order to point to Him, I have to be sure I’m spending purposeful time with Him. I must be in the Word. When I’m in the Word, I can have healthy perspective. I cannot help but be reminded of God’s ability to handle this broken world. I can’t help but be reminded that He has a plan, and He is good.

And I do not have to understand it in order to trust it.

4. I need someone who will listen to me.

I need counselors in my life—people who know me and are not afraid to call me out. And I have a therapist who helps me know when I’m reaching my limit and when I need to take a moment, or a day, or even a week. It’s okay to get help. Actually. It’s more than okay—it’s good to get help.

5. It’s a privilege to be present in the hurting.

Once I’ve gone through steps 1-4, I reach the point where the very pain that I was being crushed by is now a privilege. His yoke is easy, and His burden is light (Matthew 11:30). Most people who are hurting do not need you to fix it—they simply need you to be present.

When we sit with people in their pain instead of quickly trying to move them through it or fix it for them, we have the privilege of exemplifying that the God of the universe is present in their story, at all times. It’s not pretty or easy, but it is a privilege.

We Serve A Good God

I got a text a few weeks ago from a former camper at one of the camps I have spoken at through the years. It read, “I had you for back-to-back-to-back years at camp. You changed my life. I remember bawling my eyes out, you hugged me and said, ‘I’m sorry someone’s done this to you.’ That really did change my life.”

I was present, and my presence pointed that student right to Jesus. That’s a privilege.

Friends, it feels like a lot because it is. I regularly remind myself that nowhere in the Bible are we promised that it will be easy or always feel good.

In fact, we’re reminded that this world is not our home (Hebrews 13:14). We’re reminded that in this world we will have trouble (John 16:33). We’re reminded that it will be hard, and it will feel hard (2 Corinthians 4:8-10).

BUT we serve a God who is in control, a God who redeems, and a God who is purposeful. The same God who tells us we will have trouble reminds us in the very same verse, “I have overcome the world” (John 16:33).

We serve a good God.

Read More From Melissa J. MacDonald

The Importance of Faith Formation in Your Volunteers

If we want our kids to follow God, we need to set an example through our ministry leaders.

Created for Wonder: How to Recapture Wonder in Your Life

God’s wonder constantly inspires kids. Read how can you reclaim that wonder for yourself!

When Kids Walk Away from Their Faith

This article includes thoughtful insights as we, as leaders, watch kids make their own choices in their faith journey.

How to Welcome Families and Engage Kids in Big Church

We can’t engage kids in church if they don’t show up. Families need to know that you want them to come. Noise and all!

Spiritual Formation in the Church, Home, and Community

Be encouraged and do not grow weary in doing good. God is with you and He is in the business of working through kids.

Take a New Grip: Encouragement for Children’s Ministers

The grip we had in March is no longer effective in August. Let’s keep asking God what He has for us!

My heart was in turmoil after just driving away from a weekend of graduation and parties. I no longer lived in Idaho, but the kids I had invested in when I was their children’s pastor still had a hold on my heart. I had flown across the country to celebrate their high school graduation, and in celebrating them I had seen the state of their hearts and their life choices.

It became evident that it wasn’t safe to drive. I was crying too hard. My tears were ANGRY. I was pleading with God to reveal Himself to them and allow them to choose Him. I sat there weeping and panicking because I felt as though I could see where the trajectory of their lives was going to take them.

As my sobs turned into sniffles and I finally quieted down, the Holy Spirit’s still small voice interrupted my pity party to say, “Mel, the best parts of our relationship have come out of your rebellion and choices. Why would you ask for less for the ones you love? Can you not trust me?”

Their Choices

Perhaps one of the most challenging parts of ministering to children is doing our very best to disciple them and then watching them make their own choices. As leaders, we love them and want what’s best for them.

If we’re honest, we like to think we know exactly what that is. In reality, our job is not actually to choose for them but to point them to Jesus and allow the Holy Spirit to do the job He is so good at. We are not raising faith robots—we are helping to shape faith giants. And in order to become giants, they have to flesh out their faith on their own.

Asking Questions

As our kids grow, it’s normal and expected for them to question their faith. In fact, I think that is one of the true signs of a growing faith. I want them to ask big questions and think big thoughts because that indicates they are making their faith their own.

I used to encourage kids to ask me any questions they had about God and their faith. One day, like an epiphany, I realized that I was putting myself in a role I was not intended to hold. I was in danger of making disciples of myself instead of making disciples of Jesus.

While I can certainly answer the question, “Is Jesus real?” I would much rather they figure that out for themselves. They are working and growing their faith muscles and their identity in Christ as they wrestle with big questions.

So now I recognize that questions like these simply aren’t mine to answer:

• “How can God take care of the whole world at once?”
• “Is God real?”
• “How can I believe in a God who lets bad things happen?”

Rather, it is my responsibility to point them to Jesus and let them know their big questions are awesome and perfect to take to a big God. Now, absolutely there are times I talk through things with them but that is only after I have made sure to encourage them to seek God’s guidance first.

Our Job

One of my favorite verses is Proverbs 22:6, “Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old he will not turn from it.” My friends, that verse is a promise we can cling to. It also clearly delineates our job. We train up, they turn back to their training, and the Holy Spirit guides them.

Notice that our job is not to panic, not to plead, and not to try and tell the Holy Spirit the time and age we would like them to turn back. I find that when I start to feel overwhelmed with fear, it’s a warning sign that I have forgotten my role and the role of the Holy Spirit. When I realign myself with the truth, that is when I find peace and I’m able to pray, “thy will be done.”

Some of these little ones we pour our hearts and our souls into will walk away. In the process of making their faith their own, they will choose to walk away from their faith. I have a process I try to stick to when I see that happen.

I Grieve

There is no way around it—it is incredibly heartbreaking to watch this happen. I try not to ignore it or make it “feel” better. I cry my little heart out and allow myself to feel the feels.

p.s. If it grieves God’s heart, it’s ok for it to grieve your heart.

I Question

I ask myself if I did my best to point them to Jesus and if I could have done things differently. If I see a change opportunity, I acknowledge it and I adjust as needed. It is important to not allow it to cripple me or stop me from moving forward. I am kind to who I was, and I move on as a wiser leader.

I Remain Available

It’s important to never ever cut kids off even though it hurts that they’ve cut God off. Remaining as present in their lives as they allow me to be is something I truly value. I do not try to convince them they’re wrong. I simply continue to affirm my love for them and the value they hold. And I let the Holy Spirit do His job.

I Pray

You better believe I pray. A lot. In fact, I often welcome their posts on social media to pop up. Even though it may be painful, it reminds me to pray. I pray without ceasing.

I Believe Proverbs 22:6

There isn’t a way to know the time. But I believe that at some point they will turn back to what they know. God’s Word never returns void (Isaiah 55:11). I continue to believe that, as the Holy Spirit calls them back, they will turn back to Him at some point in their lives.

God Is Faithful

In front of that lake, I slowly, and with great effort, unclenched my fists and pictured those girls in my hands. One by one, I released them and their stories to God. I purposely made the decision to trust that the One who made them would be faithful to keep calling them back to Him. He has never not been faithful.

Wonder Ink

What if Sunday morning was just the starting point? Wonder Ink is a customizable digital curriculum and toolkit for creatively engaging kids and families in God’s Word. Wonder Ink sparks curiosity and guides children on a journey of faith through the wonder of God.

Explore Wonder Ink

“Auntie Mo, Bogey just kissed me on the lips, and now we’re married!” This was the declaration my 4-year-old niece made after our puppy expressed his deep love for her through his kisses.

“I made this for you, Miss Mel, because you’re so beautiful. It’s a picture of you!” These are the words that accompanied one of the rougher sketches of myself a child has ever drawn. From my frizzy hair down to my tiny feet, the picture certainly was a showstopper.

Created for Wonder

One of the things I love most about kids is their wonder. Everything and anything can be magical and amazing. The most mundane can turn into the spectacular. It’s not that they purposely try to find wonder, it’s that they can’t help but be in awe of things. From Christmas trees to puppies to their favorite people—they are in awe.

The simple reality is we were all created for wonder. God designed us with wonder, and our wonder is what draws us to Him. All of God’s creation speaks of Him, and it is full of wonder.

“The heavens declare the glory of God;
    the skies proclaim the work of his hands.
Day after day they pour forth speech;
    night after night they reveal knowledge.
They have no speech, they use no words;
    no sound is heard from them.
Yet their voice goes out into all the earth,
    their words to the ends of the world” (Psalm 19:1-4) 

A Time to Relearn

As adults, we have a lot to relearn about wonder. Somewhere along the way, many of us have forgotten to wonder. We get busy, jaded, or wounded, and often our wonder is the first thing to go.

When is the last time you were in awe of the fact that God made you for a purpose? When is the last time you allowed your heart to skip a beat over the fact that you are created in the image of God, and you are loved by Him? Nothing you can or can’t do will ever disqualify you from His love. That should cause wonder!

The beauty of wonder is it draws us in, and, in turn, it draws others in. As my foster son sat and stared at our Christmas tree, I could not help but join him. His wonder was so encompassing, I was drawn to it. I paused my endless laundry folding and sat with him and stared quietly at the sparkling lights. No words were needed as we allowed ourselves to simply be awed.

Reclaim the Pursuit of Wonder

In The Message version of Psalm 111:2, it says, “God’s works are so great, worth a lifetime of study—endless enjoyment!”

The issue is not that there is nothing to wonder about, it is that we have stopped allowing ourselves to wonder. Let me give you a few ideas for recapturing the wonder in your own life.

Ask for It

It may sound simple, but try asking the Holy Spirit to give you wonder. The very exercise of asking is part of positioning yourself to be aware of wonder. The Holy Spirit loves to do transformative work in our lives and rekindling wonder is extremely transformative.

Create Pause for It

Genesis 1:31 “God saw all that he had made, and it was very good.”

God paused and took count, and then He affirmed it. Create space in your days to look around and affirm the wonder that you see. Is it a beautiful sunset? A kind text? Undeserved grace from a friend? Recognize it and enjoy it.

Go Out of Your Way to Find It

“Mel, can you come here? Hurry!” my foster son yelled from the living room a few days ago. I hurried over, “Look at that sunset. It’s so beautiful.” He had opened the blinds wide to present to me the pink sky. He had gone out of his way to watch for the sunset because he knows they’re my favorite.

If finding wonder right in front of you is especially challenging, go searching for it. God has never not revealed Himself to those who seek Him.

Jeremiah 29:13 “You will seek me and find me when you seek me with all your heart.”

Allow Wonder Back In

Finally, my friends, may I remind you that you yourselves are a wonder-filled reflection of God? Created in His image, on purpose for a purpose. He did His best work on you. From the tip of your hair to the tip of your toes, you are wonderful.

As you embrace wonder, I guarantee you’ll help those around you do so as well. Wonder draws us in and draws others in. The kids you serve, the volunteers you lead, the parents you guide, the family you love; may your wonder trickle down and out onto them.

Just like a child who gasps with delight when they encounter a butterfly, may you find yourself gasping in wonder at the goodness of the God who created you. Allow wonder back in.

Wonder Ink

What if Sunday morning was just the starting point? Wonder Ink is a customizable digital curriculum and toolkit for creatively engaging kids and families in God’s Word. Wonder Ink sparks curiosity and guides children on a journey of faith through the wonder of God.

Explore Wonder Ink

We lose nothing by cheering on the home. We lose nothing—and we gain so much more.

We’re going to talk about partnering with the home. Full disclosure: I don’t have any biological kids, but I have been able to parent many, many kids. And it’s a blessing. On Mother’s Day, one of my kids who is 28 sent me a gift card and a note saying, “my life would look drastically different if it hadn’t been for you.” It made me cry—in fact all I’ve done is cry this week.

So, I’m not a biological parent, but I am a parent.

I have been in your shoes. I was a children’s pastor, and I was overseas working with kids for a while. I’ve done a lot of upper level leading down. But my big thing has always been making sure that I’m doing what I’m talking about. So, I purposely continue to work with kids because I love them.

You guys know that we get the best stories working with kids. I love being able to do that right now from where I live in Iowa. With being home more, I have been able to serve our teenagers and have a small group. In fact, if you’re on social media with me, you would have seen my small group of girls. I also direct an afterschool program that we started in January.

We thought, how can we serve our community?

Asking the Right Questions

I’m in the trenches with you, and I’m asking those same kinds of questions. How do we help the home partner with kids? How do we help the home understand that they need to be spiritually working with their kids? And how do we do that without dropping off a box full of resources or sending emails that are never opened?

There’s nothing worse than when you use MailChimp or MailerLite and you can see that only three people opened this beautiful email you put your heart and soul into. Or you put up a YouTube video and only 8 people viewed it for 2 minutes.

So, how do we do it?

It’s challenging. I wish I could say that, by the end of this, you’re going to have all the answers, but I can’t tell you that because it’s an ever-evolving thing. And honestly, I think the best thing we can do is learn from each other.

One of the things we do too often in ministry is try to copy what someone else is doing because they’re getting good results. We think it’ll work for us, but that doesn’t work. The best thing you can do is figure out your context and how the idea works for you and your people.

All that to say, be careful of trying to do exactly what everyone else is doing. Thinking the ideas will play out the same exact way won’t work, and that’s because we’re all unique. And our church bodies are unique—as are our communities.

Biblical Role of the Church Community

We’re going to talk a little bit about what the biblical role of the church community is in relation to the home. I’m a pastor’s kid, and we lived in a parsonage. I was literally at the church all the time.

In that, I grew up understanding that the church had a very important role in my spiritual walk. One of the things that happened though the years—and then as I became a children’s pastor—is that I began to realize that I had put the church in a role it wasn’t meant to have.

One of the things that I was processing and wrestling with, even before the pandemic hit, was How do we celebrate the church, but not put the church in the role of the family? What does that look like?

I got all the angst and the feelings and the groanings that come with that.

Deuteronomy 6

When we look at the biblical role of the church, it kind of changes things. So, Deuteronomy 6 is a spot we go often. Talk about these truths to your kids as you’re on the road, as you’re putting them to bed, when they’re at the bus stop, etc.  

It tells us to just do life and tell them God’s truths. Well, what we often do is we look at that and we tell parents Deuteronomy 6—you need to be doing this. But we often forget who the audience actually was. The audience was Israel.

Deuteronomy 6 is a call to the community of faith to pass on faith to the next generation. That means it takes all of us. And it takes all of us because the reality is the whole church is not tucking our kids into bed every night.

The partnership between the church and home is important. It takes a village, and the Hebraic community did life together.

Jesus at the Temple

If you remember the story of Jesus at the temple—which is how it’s titled—you’ll remember that’s when Mary and Joseph couldn’t find Jesus. (And if I were to title it, it’d be That Time the Parents Lost Jesus—because that’s really what happened.  I mean, we put the good biblical spin on it, but really Joseph and Mary lost the Savior of the world.)

Anyways, in the story they can’t find Him. It takes a while for them to realize He’s gone. In Scripture it says they assumed He was with the company. So, here’s what happens. They assumed He was with the family—or the community. And they’re really not that worried because they did life together.

Well, then it got to the point where they really weren’t sure where He was because Aunt Susan hadn’t seen Him, and Uncle Joe didn’t know where He was either.

But my favorite part of the story is when they find Him in the temple. If you know Scripture, you know that Jesus can’t sin. Right? But he’s a preteen boy. And He says to them, “Didn’t you know I would be in My Father’s house?”

As His mom, I’d be like, “Get Your rear out of Your Father’s house because Your earthly father has a few words for You, young man.”

But the point of that story is that they assumed He would be with the faith community because they did life together.

The Beginning of Sunday School

And from that, we have morphed to this: The Sunday school movement came out of the 1800s and the Industrial Revolution when kids were working and didn’t go to school. They only had Sundays off. And really well-meaning people began to see these kids and want to help them learn. They learned all kinds of subjects to help them through life—including Scripture.

Eventually, it became Sunday school that we know it today. That’s kind of how the church began to take the place of the parents.

Psalm 78

Another Scripture I like to turn to is Psalm 78.

“We will not hide these truths from our children;
    we will tell the next generation
about the glorious deeds of the Lord,
    about his power and his mighty wonders.
For he issued his laws to Jacob;
    he gave his instructions to Israel.
He commanded our ancestors
    to teach them to their children,
so the next generation might know them—
    even the children not yet born—
    and they in turn will teach their own children.
So each generation should set its hope anew on God,
    not forgetting his glorious miracles
    and obeying his commands”

Psalm 78:4-7 (NLT)

It goes on to say in verse 11 that they forgot what He had done.

How does a whole generation forget what God has done? It’s when we stop telling the next generation what God has done. It’s when we forget to tell the next generation about the good deeds of the Lord. When we forget to talk about how we have seen God in our day and our week, when we forget to share the stories of God at work in our lives—that’s when a whole generation forgets.

We all need to pass on faith. We are all in this together. Even the crankiest man named Al, who hates kids, but comes to church because he loves Jesus, has a part to play in passing on faith to the next generation.

God Works Through Kids

What if God desires to use kids in the home before he uses the parents? This is not every home, but can you think of a family that started coming to church because their kids started asking questions about Jesus?

I continually forget that when I preach, that God moves through kids. I continually forget because there’s still this arrogant adult side of me. I forget that God’s in the business of using kids to do His work. He uses me too, but He uses kids.

We were created by God for God. There is this innate desire within every single one of us to know about God. So, because we were created by God for God, we want to know about Him.

And if you look throughout Scripture, God has always been in the business of using kids.

When the pandemic started, I was so burdened for my neighborhood because I have a lot of kids who are not in safe homes. I’m a doer, and my guess is that probably 80% of you reading this are doers because you don’t go into ministry to be passive. I asked the Lord what I should do. And I felt like He told me to start praying.

Pray

Our prayers are so much more powerful than we give them credit for.

And I just prayed. In fact, there’s one house right across the street where I know the kids aren’t safe. I started praying specifically for that house. And suddenly, one day one of the kids from that house shows up at my door. He asked if he could do some work for money, so by golly, I found things for him to do. I started buying him popsicles. He knew if he came over, he’d get a popsicle.

And I started feeding him because I knew he wasn’t getting fed. Well, then I would send things home.  I became that crazy weirdo that you probably should tell your kids to stay away from. Pretty soon he shows up with his little sister. He then brought his other sister.

Then there was a day that I’ll never forget. He showed up with his giant-man-eating dog. It was 120 pounds. He goes, “This is my dog, Demon. He wanted to meet you.”

Power in Prayer

So, I want to encourage you. As you think about partnering with the home, do not underestimate the power of praying for these homes and for these kids. Your first and most important work should be praying. I am guilty of making it the last thing all the time. But you know what? God has continually blown me away as I prayed.

And I thought, how like God to bring a kid to my door when I couldn’t get to His.

Get those great saints in your church community praying. Give them a list, give them a street or a map of your town, and say, “I need you to pray over it.” Then follow up with how God’s answering those prayers. Otherwise, you get weary doing good.

I find most parents are not aware of their spiritual role in their kids’ lives. Even in well-meaning Christian families, parents don’t understand.

Educate Parents

After you’ve prayed, do a little bit of educating. I don’t want you to go buy them a book. They don’t want another book. I like to remind parents that they are a representation of God to their kids. When you hug your kids after they get hurt, you’re helping them understand that they can come to you when they’re hurt, and you’re showing them they can come to God when they’re hurt.

What if we go, did you know that by loving your kid, you’re helping them experience the love of Jesus? Did you know that that you’re influencing your kids spiritually without even meaning to—what if you did it on purpose? What would that look like? What if as you tuck them in at night, you’d say, “Let’s pray together, let’s thank Jesus for our day, or ask where you saw God at work today?“

This takes no time, but parents just don’t know. Give them some really practical ideas, simple things. You are not giving them a book and you’re not giving them curriculum. You are simply saying, “Hey tonight, Sarah, share with your child where you saw God at work today.” You can even teach parents how to bless their children.

Because the other thing we’re really good at is putting all the work on the kid. We’ve got to step up as the adults in their lives.

Working Together

There is a place for the church community. And there’s still a place for the family.

Do I understand how it all works? Not at all. But here’s what I do understand:

Take a kid out of the roughest, most awful possible thing. Light always shines brighter in the darkness. And you might think, but she was only with us for two hours this week. When you take two hours of light—as opposed to a week of darkness—you never forget the light.

Do not become weary in doing good. You can make a difference. We’re engaging the parents when we can, the family when we can, and we’re also loving these kids when we can.

Don’t Be Afraid of Change

I do our VBS every year. We have rough situations that kids face in our area every day. They deal with a lot. I looked at my team and told them that I was done focusing on things like verse memorization or how much money kids can bring for missions. I told my team that it was time to make changes.

Our priorities for VBS this year are that every kid who walks through the door of our church knows that they’re safe, and every kid who walks through the door of a church knows that they’re loved by us. And if they know they’re safe and they’re loved by us, guess what? We’ve just introduced them to a God who loves them unconditionally.

I want you to put your hand on the shoulder of every single kid you encounter and say, I’m so glad you’re here. I’m so proud of you. I’m so glad you’re here. You are loved.

We are going to be the biggest cheerleaders of the home, and we’re going to love these kids to the best of our ability.

You Can Keep Doing Good

Don’t become weary in doing good, and don’t put parameters on what that “good” needs to look like. Don’t tell God what the good you’re doing needs to look like. Listen for Him to tell you what the good is that you should be doing. You lose nothing.

We lose nothing by cheering on the home. We lose nothing—and we gain so much more.

Join in with what God is doing. Start asking Him to reveal to you what you need to be doing. That means opening your hands and releasing control. If we’re going to remain relevant—if we’re going to remain partners in spiritual formation—it’s going to be through a posture of humility.

Keep at it. Spiritual formation happens in the home, in the church, and it also happens in our communities. And if you try to put it into a box, you’re going to miss out on what God is calling us to do.

Ready to help parents create an environment for spiritual growth?

Get ready to help families with their most important task, in our guide from Ministry Spark: 7 Ways to Encourage Today’s Parents as Spiritual Influencers at Home.

Download your free guide

Free Guide

Ready to help parents create an environment for spiritual growth?

Get ready to help families with their most important task, in our guide from Ministry Spark: 7 Ways to Encourage Today’s Parents as Spiritual Influencers at Home.

Download your free guide

Free Guide

Ready to help parents create an environment for spiritual growth?

Get ready to help families with their most important task, in our guide from Ministry Spark: 7 Ways to Encourage Today’s Parents as Spiritual Influencers at Home.

Download your free guide

Free Guide

In this season especially, you need to let families know they are welcome. Don’t say they’re welcome and then not change anything.

We are going to talk about engaging children in big church—a question, thought, and conversation that is a big deal. One of the things we often find is that people think that engaging kids in big church means keeping them quiet. And, as we all know, that’s actually not engagement.

When I was 24, I was living in the Pacific Northwest and driving along the Columbia River Gorge. God began to speak to my heart and said, Mel, I want you to start coming alongside other leaders. And I was like, Lord, I am 24. I’m the young whipper snapper. I got nothing.

And He called me to it although He didn’t bring it to fruition right there. Side note: God often calls us to something but doesn’t bring it to fruition right away.

And so, He called me to it. My heart, from that point on, was how do I come alongside those in the trenches and lead, love, and serve them.

As we think about engaging children in big church, it’s important to recognize that it is a complicated subject. So, we’re going to delicately go through it.

First, I know the fear that comes with identity. As a children’s pastor my identity is that I serve kids. And in this time where we aren’t necessarily having kids’ church, we’re almost not sure who to be anymore because we don’t really know what our jobs look like. But having kids in big church is actually the biggest opportunity that we have ever had to minister to kids and families.

Understand the Beginning

What if, instead of thinking of this as a disappointment, we view this as the biggest opportunity we’ve ever had?

I say that for a few reasons. I’ve been talking about the idea of kids in big church for years.

Historically speaking, whenever Sunday school started, it started with street kids who were working in factories six days a week. And then, on the seventh day, Sunday, some really great Christ followers decide to help get these kids out of the streets. They believed they needed to go to school. So, they started teaching them on Sundays. They also added in morality and Bible because that was their heart. What has happened is this idea has morphed through the years to what we now call Sunday school.

In the church, we’ve kind of tweaked it to the point where we began to say, okay, parents, you bring your kids to us on a Sunday and we will take care of their spiritual welfare.

Well, that’s actually not our job and that can be really hard to hear. For some of you, that’s actually in your job description now. But as ministry leaders, our job is not to be the number one influencer in a child’s spiritual life. Biblically speaking, that is not our job.

So historically speaking, this is where Sunday school started. But biblically speaking, our job is to come alongside parents because parents are the number one spiritual influencer in kids’ lives—good or bad.

I’ve spent a lot of time mourning over the bad. And then God reminds me that He actually is still God no matter the circumstances.

Trust God to Be God

I’ll tell you a little about my dad.

My dad is a pastor. He’s been a pastor for 40 plus years. My dad grew up in a home where his mom was an unpaid prostitute. Men were in and out of the home. My dad had no concept of who God was at age five, but he knew he was going to be a pastor.

Yes, you read that correctly. I’ve asked him, dad, how did you know that—did you even know what a pastor was? He told me, no, I just knew friends who knew God.

Hear me on this. You’re not God because you’re bad at it. The God we serve calls to a five-year-old who has absolutely no concept of who He is and says, I’m going to call you out of that.

So, don’t ever discount God in the midst of hard circumstances.

Good or bad families are the spiritual influencers in kids’ lives. The church was never meant to be in the first spot there. Never. Now, don’t misunderstand. There are times when we get to do that. And I feel there are times God brings certain kids into our lives.

Link Arms with Families

Deuteronomy 6 talks about how we talk about His commands to the kids. Sometimes we think it’s all for parents. But it’s actually referring to the entire community of faith. It’s where we come in and link arms with the family.

That’s our job—to link arms.

I don’t know about you, but I probably spent the first 5 years in children’s ministry not linking arms, and instead, being like don’t touch me. Parents, could you just drop the kids off and go? We have a lot more fun when you’re not here.

It’s so important that we remember God’s intent. This was His intent from day one—linking arms.

So, when we think about kids in big church, don’t be discouraged. Rather, look at it as an opportunity. Keep in mind God is the same yesterday, today, and forever. God’s not out of this.

It can be scary. It can be frustrating. Some of you might be thinking, but you don’t know my pastor. I don’t. But I’m telling you I probably know a version of them. We have to face it like it’s an opportunity instead of feeling disgruntled about it and mad about it. Go ahead and have those feelings and then move on.

I believe our job right now in ministry is to be resourcing, equipping, and cheering on parents and families because they need us to come alongside them.

They need us to say, you’re doing a great job. What they don’t need is you to send five emails every week and then get mad that nobody responds. They need you to be encouraging them, equipping them, giving them solid resources, and then saying, we see you. And we’re so proud of you, and we are a hundred percent behind you.

Remember Your Ministry Matters

I want to remind you, children’s ministry leader, that although ministry looks different right now, you and your calling still matter.

You may need to tweak some of the outpouring that comes out of your heart. You might need to stop doing what used to work. And you might even need to stop thinking that they will work again.

Give yourself a pep talk. I still have a heart for kids. I still have a heart for families. I still have a heart to serve Christ.

Lead Up

We need you to lead up. How you partner with your lead pastor in this season is going to make all the difference in kids being engaged in big church.

I’ve coached leaders for over eight years. I could tell you horror stories. I know all about lead pastors. I know the ones that are hard. I know those awesome ones that you’re so grateful for. And I know it can feel hard and intimidating.

Whether you feel like you have a voice or not, whether you feel like it’s welcome or not, you need to be leading up.

Leading up looks a lot like not coming angry, but coming and saying, hey, how can I serve you pastor? I can imagine this as a really tough time. How can I come alongside you?

Speak Up

We also need you to speak up. Would you please use your voice? You have been called by God, and God does not ever call us to be silent. When you’re in a situation where you’re supposed to use your voice, then speak up.

That’s your job for kids. And that’s your job for families. So, as the leadership team is planning and dreaming of ideas, you need to ask, how can we incorporate families into that? How can we serve kids in that?

How can we …? That’s your job. We need you to speak up.

I talked about how great children’s ministry leaders are at pivoting in my last post. We really are THE BEST at it. But you know what? These lead pastors are some of the worst at pivoting. That’s because they just do what they’ve always done because they were with adults. Adults can handle just doing what we’ve always done.

We can’t do that with kids.

Tune Your Ear

Next, we need you to keep looking up and tune your ear to the Father. If you just start talking or leading up without making sure what you’re saying is lining up with God’s calling, then you really are just creating noise.

Tune your ear to the Father and pick those times when you need to speak up.

When I feel called by God to speak up, it’s not my job to control how the person handles what I say. It’s not my job to control what that person says or what they do with the information I’ve given them.

I walk away knowing I was obedient. My job is obedience. My job is not conviction. It is not to push. My job is to go, hey, here’s an idea. One of the best places we see this in the Bible is with Pilot’s wife. When she comes to Pilot and she’s like, hey, uh, I’ve had this dream. I’m really kind of uncomfortable with what we’re doing with Jesus.

She tells pilot and then she walks away. Now you could say, well, nothing changed. That wasn’t the point. I really believe the point was that she was obedient to what God was stirring in her heart. And we don’t know the full story. We don’t know all the nuances there. But she was obedient.

So, speak up and then walk away.

Invite Families In

You will not engage kids in church if they don’t show up. And here’s what that means: most families will not show up. If you don’t market and message to them that kids are welcome, it is easier for families to stay at home. They need to know that you want them to come. Noise and all. Cheerios and all. If you are open for all, then people will show up.

I’ve talked to too many leaders in the last few months who are so frustrated with families who aren’t coming to church.

How are you inviting them?

Many would answer that it’s church and they know they’re invited. I would challenge you in that. This is nothing like church used to be. Parents are worried about keeping their kids quiet, not getting the stares from those around them, and keeping their kids safe.

In this season especially, you need to let them know they are welcome. Don’t say they’re welcome and then not change anything. That’s very unfair.

Have A Buddy System

One idea is to have a buddy system. At my church, we started this a long time ago. Those of you who work with kids with special needs or behavioral issues understand this very well. We always recruit buddies specifically for these kids.

So, what if in the same way you found buddies for the families at your church? Because in this season you might not be able to reach all 20 families in your church that you need to reach.

What if you found a wiser person who’s a little bit deeper in their walk with God? It could be a couple or a single mom. Someone who’s willing to check in and pray for them. You want someone who will go out of their way to help and who will invite them to church.

It will be important to have someone who will mask up and glove up—or even wear a hazmat suit—in order to make a family feel comfortable.

One of our jobs as ministry leaders before COVID was to delegate and equip those around us to serve. This is a great way during COVID to see the body of Christ working together.

Leading with Opportunity

Take a look at this handout and let’s go through some practical ideas together. This sheet can also help your leadership team and lead pastor think through how to engage kids in this time.

Think Through Your Attitude

Children’s leaders, I’m hoping you can lead up in this and speak up in this as well. If you’re cranky and angry about this, do not expect your lead pastor to come in with a good attitude. Do not expect the lead team to feel good about this.

If you lead with opportunity in your next staff meeting, it’s going to be really cool to see what God does.

Think Through Your Ministry

Think through your philosophy, theology, and ministry to kids. And I’m not going to get into different denominational beliefs or anything. My guess is most of us believe that God came for kids, right? And that God gives kids full access to Him.

So, if God gives kids full access to Him, we need to be making sure that we are allowing kids to have full access to Him in our big church services.

We need to come with that presupposition, understanding they are contributing members of the body of Christ.

Kids are welcome to the body of Christ way before they are 18. And if we believe that, then we need to act like it. And one of the things that used to frustrate me so much is everyone comes to church together. We sing and then the kids are dismissed. Get out of here so we can do “real” church.

(Well, and you might say, well, they go and do church on their level. True.)

But we were meant to do life in community. And it’s really hard to do community if we’re in separate areas.

Think Through Your Words

Even the person who does announcements has to remember there’s going to be little ones in the room that won’t understand all the words, and that is okay. And quite honestly, not all the adults understand all the words either.

You know, we say, now we’re going to do a benediction. There are a lot of people who come to church and go, I don’t really know what that means. I like eggs Benedict. I could eat some eggs Benedict. Let’s do that.

So, if you’re going to use big words, you need to explain them. 

Think Through Your Topics and Examples

I speak at kids’ camps all summer. And one of the things I do is I never assume that everyone knows what I mean, so I’ll go, hey, we’re going to pray.

And I’ll say this. We’re going to close our eyes. We’re going to fold our hands. We’re going to bow our head. But you know, this is why we do that. It’s not just because you have to do that in order to pray. And I go through it, we close our eyes so that we can focus. We fold our hands, so we don’t touch anyone else. We bow our heads so we can make sure our eyes aren’t looking around.

And then the next day I’ll go, well today because God can hear us anytime, we’re going to pray with our eyes open. Well, they think that’s pretty awesome. Then with the next day, we’ll start marching in place.

It’s not necessarily about the big words or about having the right exact body posture. This is talking to God. So, your pastor needs to think through this.

Most people who don’t work with kids, don’t think about how kids think. Kids need children’s ministry leaders to advocate for them in this way. I will guarantee these lead pastors are not purposely trying to talk over kids’ heads.

Think Through Your Routines

If you have baptism, communion, or another faith routine, you need to pause and create spaces for families to learn together. Do not assume that kids are going to understand what community is.

One of the things I’m really encouraging pastors to do is to create pauses throughout the service where families can talk together.

And I don’t just mean mom, dad, and kids. That’s pretty ignorant to what family looks like these days.

Have people grab the people around them—because the body of Christ is our family. You can do it with a mask on, and you can do it socially distant. You can do it however you want, but create pause moments so that we’re supporting what’s being talked about up on the stage. Meet people where they are.

Think Through Your Timing

Gone are the days where pastors need to be doing 45 minutes sermons.

Here’s the deal. Kids do not have the attention span or the actual physical ability to sit still for 45 minutes. So, we’ve got to think through our timing. I think you can preach longer if you have pause moments throughout. If you have a 3-point sermon, family discussion questions after each point, and you give 5 minutes to talk through them—then you can preach longer.

Well, and I just talked to a pastor yesterday and he goes, we’ve been doing that, and it’s been phenomenal. Now it doesn’t look the way it used to. And it actually can feel chaotic.

I mean, I’ve been pushing for years before COVID to do this. Now I sound brilliant, even though I was saying it before nobody was listening to me.

This will really help us engage kids.

Think Through Your Reactions

Lastly, think through your reactions. Kids are noisy. But if they have a pastor who just goes, oh, aren’t you guys so glad it’s noisy today. Isn’t it good to be together? Are we still glad that we have a church where we have kids? I can tell you many churches I go to where they don’t have kids.

The reality is they are not going to be around a whole lot longer. So how the lead pastor, the lead team, and even the worship team interact with kids is really important.

I love when I go preach at a church and kids come up and they just kind of start twirling in the front during worship. They are a hot mess. They’re not good dancers. It is just awesome. It is exactly what I think heaven will look like. And if they feel welcome in that, it changes the whole dynamic.

Don’t tell kids that they’re welcome if you aren’t prepared to help them actually feel welcomed even in their mess. My dad is great at this. He’ll even just go hey kids, listen, be quiet really quickly. I’m going to say something really important. The kids will kind of stop, and they’ll listen. Then they go back to do their thing.

Really Welcome Kids

We have two services since we started back in person, and we’ve been rolling out a carpet specifically for some of our kids who have autism. They have a little spot in the sanctuary with toys—and you guys they’re loud.

They’re SO loud and nobody complains. It has just become the routine. And we’re glad that they’re there. When you walk through the sanctuary, we also have kids’ size noise-canceling-headphones, and we have busy bags for them. They’re all sanitized—don’t you worry.

But what that says is, hey, you’re welcome here and we actually mean it. So, if you’re going to say you’re welcome, do some things. You need to look at the people within your community and your church and go, what do we need here?

Look Out for a New Song

At the beginning of COVID I was sitting in Psalm 40 and 41.

I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pit, out of the mud and mire; he set my feet on a rock and gave me a firm place to stand. He put a new song in my mouth, a hymn of praise to our God. Many will see and fear the Lord and put their trust in him. Blessed is the one who trusts in the Lord, who does not look to the proud, to those who turn aside to false gods. Many, Lord my God, are the wonders you have done, the things you planned for us. None can compare with you; were I to speak and tell of your deeds, they would be too many to declare.

Psalm 40 1-5 (NIV)

I wanted to speak over you, and I want to bless you to be on the lookout for the new song that God’s giving you to sing in the season.

Trust that He’ll Use It All

We serve a God who never wastes our pain, who never wastes the hard, who never has a throw-away week or year. He says, look, I am doing a new thing. Even now it springs up, do you not perceive it? I will make a river in the desert. This is the God we serve.

Our job is to be on the lookout. I want a new song.

I do. I hope God gives your church a new song as well. And I hope that many will see what he has done in your church and in your community.

God, please move. We want to see you move—whether it is the way we thought it would be or not. We just want to see you.

Be on the lookout for a new song.

Engaging Kids in Big Church

Hear the full message from Melissa MacDonald as she gives you practical tools and encouragement for welcoming families back to church and engaging kids when they get there.

View Webinar

Engaging Kids in Big Church

Hear the full message from Melissa MacDonald as she gives you practical tools and encouragement for welcoming families back to church and engaging kids when they get there.

View Webinar

Engaging Kids in Big Church

Hear the full message from Melissa MacDonald as she gives you practical tools and encouragement for welcoming families back to church and engaging kids when they get there.

view webinar

We’re doing this, not because we hope everyone notices how amazing we are, but because I need a new grip to help mark out a path for others.

If we can agree on one thing, it’s that children’s ministry leaders know how to pivot. But, if you’re like me, you’re starting to actually hate that word with a passion.

Children’s ministry leaders know how to pivot like nobody’s business, because that’s what we do all the time. We were doing that before COVID hit, because Johnny ate those peanuts from that lady’s purse and he’s allergic. And you have Susie peaking in the bathroom. You have the volunteer who said they’d be there but didn’t show up.

We’re used to pivoting.

So, it has been really fun for me to watch children’s ministry leaders in this season. You guys rise to the top of leadership, and it’s a joy to see. As someone who’s been in full-time ministry for 17 years, my deepest desire is to cheer on other ministry leaders. I hope if I have a legacy at all, it is a legacy of encouraging leaders to go further than I ever will.

I want to be cheering you on and clapping for you and helping you forward. As we dive in, I first want to commend you. I want you to pat yourself on the back for just a minute, because you’re doing a good job in this season.

Let Go of Any God Complex

So, children’s ministry leader, I want you to hear a few things. First of all, I want you to take a deep breath, and I want you to relax. And I’m going to say something that is not going to rock your world, but you probably need to hear it.

You are not God.

And I know that can feel really offensive because you’re like, I know that. But my guess is that at some point in the last four or five months, you have had that urge to fix everything or to make everything okay.

And I’m speaking from a place of total openness. I struggle with a god complex because I like to fix things and to be in control. And so, this season has especially been hard because so many things have been out of my control.

It has been hard in a good way, in a very soul-shaping way, but also, I hate it. I’ve had to remind myself time and time again that I’m not God.

I also have to remind myself that God doesn’t have COVID and God’s not in quarantine. He’s totally and completely present in the midst of this.

A Lesson from Hebrews

I’ve been spending quite a bit of time in Hebrews—not because I’m very spiritual, but because I like Hebrews and I like going there. First of all, Hebrews 11 is my very favorite chapter in the Bible.

I’m a storyteller, I love narrative, and I love the great men and women of faith in there. I love reading their names and then knowing their stories. Many times, I’ll even think to myself, if they made it, maybe I have a chance.

But, one of the things that I was looking at is the reminder that God is in control and Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever. We like to stop there. But it goes on to say, so don’t be attracted by strange new ideas.

And we all know 2020 has just been one strange new idea after another. I don’t know if we would use the word attract, but we’ve all been distracted by the strange new thing.

I’m someone who has severe health issues. So, my doctor has told me that I’m not going anywhere probably the rest of my life. (That last part isn’t true. I’m exaggerating because I’m mad.)

But in reality, he told me that I would have to quarantine much longer than most people. So, part of being me is sitting back and watching the world go by. And then I find myself getting distracted by everything going on.

I want to remind you that Jesus Christ is the same yesterday, today, and forever. The same God that was in charge in February is still the same God in church today. He’s not absent. He is not quarantined, and He is not social distancing from you.

God is living and active.

Not All New Ideas Are Good Ideas

Also, please take some time to relax. Stop coming up with new ideas simply for the sake of having ideas.

There’s a bit of an urgency that’s been created through all of this. Everybody seems to be doing something, so I better be doing something. Then that feeling of I don’t know what I’m supposed to be doing. and what I was being paid for I’m not doing anymore. So sometimes, we create things because we are operating in crisis (or even panic) mode.

We spin our wheels and we create, create, create. And as a result, we aren’t creating quality things. We’re just creating noise.

I would love to see leaders take a step back, pause, and maybe tune your ear. Ask God what He wants you to create. What ideas from You, Lord? What ideas from the team of people I have around me? Even what idea is coming from Your heart?

Feel the Hard Things

Lastly, this time is hard and exhausting. And it’s okay to feel exhausted. It is okay to feel mad. It’s okay to have all those feelings. I want to remind you to give yourself space and permission to feel the hard things.

Because when we ignore the hard situations and pretend that we’re fine, it’s fairly inauthentic and unkind to the process that we’re in.

Everything I’m sharing today is stuff that God has been working on in my own heart. And one of the things I’ve been doing is telling myself, Mel, you can feel that today. You’re allowed to feel that—you’re allowed to feel sad and you know what? You can cry today. I’m not a big crier. So, when I cry, I feel like everybody should know. In COVID, I’m crying just because I haven’t seen anyone.

It’s okay for me to feel the feelings, but here’s the caveat I give it, feel it today.

Don’t wear it tomorrow.

Don’t let it become your identity. We could make this season be all about the feelings. And I think if we make it all about the feelings, then we’re missing what God has for us in the midst of it. 

I’ve walked through some really tough seasons personally throughout my life, including the fact that I was dying for a long time. I’m still here. But part of what you learn is how to not waste the season that God has given you. And it’s not about things like learning a new language or planting all the perennials.

It’s about looking for what God has for you in this season.

Take a New Grip

My encouragement to you is to get up in Hebrews. Hebrews 12:12 is a favorite verse of mine. Take a new grip with your tired hands and strengthen your weak knees.

We serve a God that doesn’t tell us that we can never be tired. He doesn’t tell us we can never feel weak. And I love that we have a God that doesn’t say, just hold on tighter, hang on. Instead He’s like, take a new grip.

And here’s my thing for you guys: It’s August y’all. It’s time to be taking a new grip. The grip you had in March is no longer effective in August. It is exhausting. So, you have to take a new grip. You have to keep asking God what He has for you.

It’s About Who’s Behind You

The ministry side of that is the next verse, which says, mark out a straight path for your feet so that those who are weak and lame will not fall, but become strong. So, if you’re like me, I love purpose. We realize it’s not just about me.

It’s about who’s behind me too. It’s about those who are watching. And that’s what we’re all about in ministry. Who’s behind us? Who are we leading?

So, we’re doing this, not because we hope everyone notices how amazing we are, but because we need a new grip to help mark out a path for others.

And for those of us who work with kids, our entire lives are about marking a path for those little ones coming behind us. I want to encourage you in that.

It’s time for a new grip.

Engaging Kids in Big Church

Hear the full message from Melissa MacDonald as she gives you practical tools and encouragement for welcoming families back to church and engaging kids when they get there.

View Webinar

Engaging Kids in Big Church

Hear the full message from Melissa MacDonald as she gives you practical tools and encouragement for welcoming families back to church and engaging kids when they get there.

View Webinar

Engaging Kids in Big Church

Hear the full message from Melissa MacDonald as she gives you practical tools and encouragement for welcoming families back to church and engaging kids when they get there.

view webinar

If we want to see spiritually mature kids who love Jesus deep in their beings come out of our children’s ministries, we have to be investing in the leaders who are serving them.

At one point in my ministry, I had heard stories about this dad who had started coming to our church 6 months ago. I knew he and his wife had walked away from the Lord, but they were back. And they were doing their best to raise their little girls in church.

I watched from afar and saw that he was quick to laugh, expressive, and (underneath a tough exterior) seemed to be searching for purpose. I gathered my courage and approached him and his wife to ask them about serving in our children’s ministry.

When I first became a children’s pastor, I’ll be honest, I thought it meant I was going to be a pastor to kids. Little did I know that the role of children’s pastor would reach far beyond kids into their homes and into the lives of those serving them.

I learned quickly that one of my most important jobs as a children’s pastor would be pastoring the hearts of my volunteers who worked with our kids. That fostering faith formation in my volunteers would be vital to a thriving children’s ministry.

And in this season, it could mean managing both in-person and virtual volunteers.

A Shepherd’s Heart

If you’re called to lead children’s ministry, I believe you are called to have the heart of a shepherd. Regardless of what your actual title is, you are called to be a shepherd. You are called to pastor the people God puts in your realm of influence.

For most of us, that means pastoring the hearts of our volunteers. It means looking for and encouraging spiritual growth in church volunteers.

Look at the ministry of Jesus. He was put on earth to save the world. While He cared deeply about the whole world, He specifically invested in His twelve disciples. He knew that they would be used by Him to help accomplish His mission.

In Matthew 28 19-20 Jesus sends His disciples out with The Great Commission saying, “Therefore go and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, ²⁰ and teaching them to obey everything I have commanded you. And surely I am with you always, to the very end of the age.”

He releases them to the work He’s called them to. Jesus understood the importance of investing in the leaders around Him.

Our reality is this: if we want to see spiritually mature kids who love Jesus deep in their beings come out of our children’s ministries, we have to be investing in the leaders who are serving them.

We have to care deeply about the faith formation of our volunteers. It trickles down through the whole church and directly affects families.

Spiritually mature volunteers are better able to come alongside and equip parents.

Faith Formation

I believe, as leaders, we can only take people as far as we ourselves have been. If my walk with God is shallow, I will only be able to teach a shallow walk with God.

With that in mind, some of the very first work we should be doing is investing in the faith formation of our volunteers. This type of work should be happening whether you are face-to-face, using Zoom, or socially distanced in a big room.

This kind of work takes longer but produces long lasting fruit. Start by thinking about who you need to recruit.

Recruit these kinds of volunteers:

1. Recruit volunteers who are growing in their faith. This does not mean they have it all figured out, but it does mean they’re hungry, and they are actively growing in their faith.

• Recruit volunteers who are teachable. This means they want feedback, and they want to learn. Teachability goes much further in my book than ability does.

• Recruit volunteers who love the church. This means they love the body and they love how God uses the body to accomplish His work.

• Recruit volunteers who are excited about what Jesus has done for them. I always remind myself that if I’m not excited about what Jesus has done for me, how am I going to excite anyone else?

Require this from your volunteers:

1. Participation in a small group. This can be an option that your church has or you might create a small group(s) with your volunteers. Whether it’s done over video or in a Facebook group during this season, this is a beautiful way to create shared experiences and an open forum to grow together. If you recruit volunteers who are growing, be sure to create space for them to continue to grow.

• Time in “big church”. I meet far too many children’s ministry volunteers who use their volunteering in children’s ministry as a place to hide from the conviction and community of big church and big people. Require and create structure for your volunteers to spend time in big church. Remember, this will help foster faith formation in your church volunteers.

Support your volunteers by:

1. Sharing personally about your own spiritual growth. Share regularly about what God has been teaching you and growing in you. Fostering faith formation in our volunteers means being honest about our own faith formation. Especially in these challenging times, our volunteers need to see that we struggle and wonder and continue to fall back on Jesus. This helps promote growth in them too.

• Creating a safe place for them to serve and grow. No volunteer is perfect. At some point they are going to miss the mark or need assistance. How you respond to those situations can be a wonderful opportunity for growth. Call out what needs to be called out and then cheer them on as they try again.

• Letting them know that the person they are is far more valuable than the position they hold. Care about them. Check in on them. Notice them. Shepherding faith formation in your volunteers means you see them before you see the spots you need filled in your ministry. Appreciate them.

• Promoting a “team” mentality. We are all in this together and you are a vital part of our team. Everyone wants to be a part of something that matters, and children’s ministry is the best hard work there is. Allow your volunteers to be a part of the team.

Back to Shepherding

That husband and wife said yes—with a lot of trepidation—to serving in our children’s ministry. I eased them into it. Then, I called out the gifting I saw in them, and I nurtured it. I partnered with them and helped lead them.

They were open and growing and so excited about Jesus.

Little by little as they grew in their faith, I put them into more leadership roles. They were a part of our small group and pretty soon they were helping run the children’s ministry.

That was 15 years ago.

Today they still serve in ministry. They are strong believers and credit much of their growth to those early years serving in children’s ministry.

They had a place to grow, and try, and belong; and it formed their faith and changed their lives and their children’s lives forever.

The David C Cook Church Support Program

Imagine feeling confident that families are equipped with true discipleship materials. That’s what you’ll get with the Church Support Program. Check it out and get access to discipleship resources for leading families, children, youth, and adults—digitally or in person.

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The David C Cook Church Support Program

This program is designed to help church leaders, teachers, and volunteers continue ministry—whether virtually, in person, or a hybrid of the two.

Learn more

The David C Cook Church Support Program

This program is designed to help church leaders, teachers, and volunteers continue ministry—whether virtually, in person, or a hybrid of the two.

learn more

Growing Volunteers: Building the Body of Christ in Ministry to Kids and Families

Ministry coach Byron Ragains empowers you minister TO your volunteers, not just through them. It’s a game changer!

Download free guide

Free Guide

Growing Volunteers: Building the Body of Christ in Ministry to Kids and Families

Ministry coach Byron Ragains empowers you minister TO your volunteers, not just through them. It’s a game changer!

Download free guide

Free Guide

Growing Volunteers: Building the Body of Christ in Ministry to Kids and Families

Ministry coach Byron Ragains empowers you minister TO your volunteers, not just through them. It’s a game changer!

Download free guide

Free Guide